One thing that always catches my eye when I’m scrolling through lifestyle websites is articles about engagement rings. I’m especially curious what the author suggests for diamond-alternative rings aimed at the many brides choosing environmentally and socially friendly jewelry. Here are five things I’ve noticed about those articles that I think every girl should keep in mind when making her selection. 

1. Keep the Mohs scale in mind if you are interested in a stone other than diamond

Per GIA, the Mohs scale “numbers are based on the relative ease or difficulty with which one mineral can be scratched by another.” The scale goes from 1-10 with talc graded the lowest and diamond the highest but the scale can appear deceptive, a diamond and corundum are only one numeral away from each other and yet diamonds are much harder than corundum. I like the way the chart below illustrates this point; you get a better sense of how much harder diamond is than all other gems illustrated on the scale. If you are going for a stone in the quartz or beryl family, you want to be aware of how easily the stone can scratch or chip so you can take the necessary precautions.

2.     Some gems hold up better than others

Softer gems like garnet, beryl (which includes emerald, aquamarine, and morganite), topaz, pearls, opal, and quartz (which includes citrine, amethyst, and rose quartz) are more prone to breakage and scratches. Should you not choose them for an engagement ring? The answer is to know your lifestyle. Are you planning on, as my jewelry mentor would say, “sitting around sipping martinis all day?” If the answer is yes you can get away with an emerald or quartz. For example, the Duchess of Windsor had an emerald engagement ring and it appeared to have held up to her lifestyle. However, if you are more active and want to wear your ring during all activities, i.e. exercise, chores, hobbies that utilize your hands, etc. opt for a harder stone like corundum (which includes sapphire and ruby). Sapphires come in all colors of the rainbow and, while less hard than diamond, they can stand up to more frequent use with proper care. Diamonds can take more of a beating, but they are not immune to issues. You can chip, nick, abrade and even burn a diamond so just be aware, no stone is indestructible.

3.     Settings can make all the difference

If you do opt for a softer stone or know you are going to wear your ring during all manner of activities, pick a protective setting such as the bezel. This particular setting encloses the stone around all sides, protecting it better than a classic prong setting (keep in mind, however, you can still inflict damage to the table).

4.     There are alternatives to buying diamonds new

You can get so much bang for your buck when you buy vintage. Nowadays, are many sources including brick and mortar stores, Instagram, and auctions with vintage and antique pieces for every conceivable budget and settings from gnarly Georgian to out-of-this-world Retro and everything in between. Vintage settings are often made with more detailing and workmanship than you can afford at the same price point new and they have a character and soul all their own.

5.     If used isn’t your cup of tea, look into ethically sourced diamonds/diamond alternatives

There are so many options nowadays for those who want to make an informed choice in choosing a diamond. Many mines offer certified conflict-free diamonds, there are Canadian diamonds, lab-grown diamonds, and diamond alternatives like moissanite, each would make a good candidate for a ring and can be sourced for every budget.